Magazine

ALASKAN CAPITAL NEWS

Sunday, April 7, 2019

UNIVERSITY OF ALASKA SOUTHEAST [SEEMINGLY HAS IT OUT FOR ME]

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A stranger knocks on your door on a Saturday at 7AM sharp after you just got out of a wrongful incarceration (the charges were dropped by the state, and you haven’t even committed any crimes whatsoever). It’s cold out, you’re not expecting anyone– and you’re definitely not in the mood for company. What do you do? Do you answer the door? The guy that’s legally changing his name to Sheriff in Juneau Alaska sure didn’t.

What was this unofficial Sheriff of Las Vegas to do? Answer the door to some seemingly creeping stranger that he’s never even met before who’s wearing a strange highlighter yellow shirt or vest– or ignore the rude awakening and go on about his business since he’s now up for the day anyways due to this unwanted wake–up calling? Checking the surveillance cams sounded like a great idea as the thought crossed his mind, so he did– and saw what seems to be a UAS employee standing on the other side of his front door.

Monday, March 25, 2019

POPPING OFF FIREWORKS [LIKE A DUSTHOLE]

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Loud sounds pop off after 10PM near Auke Bay, and people with PTSD report to Alaskan Capital dispatch. Police investigate the sounds, and find out that it’s just some dumbass with fireworks.

Dispatch also reports back to ACAP that other gunshot like sounds went off elsewhere in town, but these were not inquired about as intensely just yet.

Saturday, March 23, 2019

UNIVERSITY OF ALASKA SOUTHEAST [THINGS HEAT UP]

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One call was enough, Curtis.

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Okay, you’re just gonna keep calling then? Alrighty. Guess I’m just going to have to put my foot down then.

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And put my foot down I did…. Let’s just probable cause this thing and say that “ALLEGEDLY” he obviously doesn’t want to get caught doing what he’s doing. Too late for all that now. Frankly, that first phone call was all the proof I needed, but then he just kept going, and going, and going. But, you must know that within the hour– prior to these harassing serial phonecalls (approximately 30 minutes before), I had received yet another follow up email to my previous questions. Need a reminder? Just click here….

from: UAS Chancellor’s Office
sent by: klcampbell4@alaska.edu
to: chanceseal@gmail.com
date: Mar 22, 2019, 4:08 PM
subject: UAS Chancellor’s response to request for public speaking forum
mailed-by: alaska.edu
signed-by: alaska-edu.20150623.gappssmtp.com
security: Standard encryption (TLS) Learn more

UAS Chancellor’s response to request for public speaking forum

UAS Chancellor’s Office (sent by klcampbell4@alaska.edu)
4:08 PM (1 hour ago)
to me

Dear Mr. Trahan:

UNIVERSITY OF ALASKA SOUTHEAST [PROVES ME RIGHT]

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from: Chance Trahan
to: klcampbell4@alaska.edu
date: Mar 19, 2019, 7:54 AM
subject: Hi Keni (Public Speaking)
mailed-by: gmail.com

Chance Trahan
Tue, Mar 19, 7:54 AM (3 days ago)
to klcampbell4

Howdy, Keni.

I’ve recently decided that I’m officially campaigning for President of the United States and I’d love to publicly speak on campus about public safety, online safety, campus safety and also officially announce the presidency campaign that I am pursuing.

Will you please assist in scheduling an event in order to do so? I appreciate the opportunity to express my concerns in the public forum and I believe that doing so on UAS campus would be idea. I am choosing UAS as the place to officially start this thing off at, as I feel more comfortable knowing that I will have our local tribes in support of a tribal fueled mission to re-establish a more natural way of life by means of indigenous culture and education.

Thank you for your time and thank you for your help. Any assistance that you can provide is greatly appreciated. Thank you.

Sincerely, Chance Trahan.

907—419—7844

––––––––

from: Keni Campbell
to: Chance Trahan
date: Mar 22, 2019, 11:19 AM
subject: Re: Hi Keni (Public Speaking)
mailed-by: alaska.edu
signed-by: alaska-edu.20150623.gappssmtp.com
security: Standard encryption (TLS) Learn more

Hello Mr. Trahan,

Saturday, March 2, 2019

UNSPEAKABLE ACTS RESEARCH [CENTER FOR THE MENTALLY INSANE]

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